TEABAG part 8

“How many of these things are there?” cried Arthur as he tried to shoot them with his electric pistol, but to no avail.
“I am determined to prove a villain...” quoted the kingly android.
“I never understood that quote,” mumbled Arthur as he re-loaded the pin chamber, “especially out of context. Does he mean I'm the villain o he is?”
“Well you obviously,” said Sid as his blaster rifle melted a hole in the head of another metal man.
“Harrumph!” harrumphed Arthur as he shot another metal man in the back of the neck. The wires there frazzled and it fell inert.
“Come ye unvalued jewels, let us take flight, they are too hard for us,” ordered Richard III.
The two metal men that were harrying Plattington and Tresham looked back at their master then leapt back onto the enemy ship.
“Whew!” whewed Sid, “I thought we were goners there,” the dwarf rested his rifle on the deck of the airship to take stock of things.
“I bet we'll see them again before this adventure is written,” rued the colonel.
“That's six metal men, one broken rail and a cut over Tresham's eye.”
“What are you doing?”
“Taking stock like the Author said.”
Arthur shook his head then put his hand up to his eyes to see the departing enemy airship more clearly.
“I bet that'll make a good level in the computer game,” said Sid as he came nearer.
“Yeas, I can see it now. Hoards of metal men leaping upon the deck and us nine fighting them off.”
“Nine?”
“Yes, you, me, Robo Sid and Arthur, Tresham, Gunby, Plattington, Chatteris and...” he looked for Ruhtra, “where's that sainted shape changer?”
“Here,” screed Ruhtra as he stopped taking the form of a seagull.
“You are supposed to be part of this team you know, not a raving coward.”
“I wasn't a raven, I was a seagull actually. I just thought you had it all in hand,” said the shape changer as he morphed into his Arthurish form.
Scubbins moaned, “It is confusing having two of you to contend with. Can't you wear a Baldrick or something Arthur.”
“You mean a small lifelike model of Tony Robinson in Blackadder?”
“No, I mean... Yes, go on then, a small lifelike model of Tony Robinson sounds funnier.” He thought for a second, “I think the Tony Robinson from the fourth series would be more apt.”
“But that one's from the future, surely Baldrick from Blackadder III would be better?”
“Are they really discussing this?” Tresham asked Gunby quietly as the half giant tended to his friend's eye.