The FREE Giveaway!

Friday, 28 February 2014


I didn't get the 10 pages of proofreading done I wanted to but I did do 5. I also inputted the 5 pages of corrections I had done on paper. I will need to do 6 pages of proofreading tomorrow to finish.

Today's joke is:

I think animal testing is a bad idea. They get all nervous and give the wrong answers!

Thursday, 27 February 2014


I have done no writing today, or even any proof reading. I am planning to proof read the last ten pages of The Victoria Conspiracy tomorrow. Although it is my daughter's birthday tomorrow so I will have to do it as soon as I wake up. I am pleased with what I wrote yesterday but now have to decide if the story is all based on the ship and character driven or whether they are going to be going places and doing things.

Today's joke is:

How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

Are you kidding? That's a hardware problem!

Wednesday, 26 February 2014

The Tawa

Today I managed to write 700 words of The Tawa. This also sounds like The Tower, my Kendra short story. This is the Lizzie McBean short I was talking about. The trouble is though that it isn't really just about the ship they are flying on. I may have to change the title...

Today's joke is:

Two jump start cables walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "You'd better not start anything in here!"

Tuesday, 25 February 2014

Dead Robots

I didn't do any writing today, just thought about the short story I may start tomorrow. Listened to an episode of Dead Robots, I couldn't have listened to it properly last time because there seemed to be loads I missed that will be quite useful.

Today's joke is:

Nikola Tesla walks into a bar and asks for a drink.

The barman says, "OK, I'll serve you, but don't get any ideas!"

Monday, 24 February 2014

Theran Chronicles

I managed to proof read two pages today, as well as put the chunk in that I missed out and revised the two paragraphs that I didn't think worked too well.

I have also done a page of planning for a Lizzie McBean short story. I will use it to advertise the Theran Chronicles.

Today's joke is:

The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. Then things get tense!

Saturday, 22 February 2014


I was too busy today to do any writing. I did see the vikings who invaded York today, I think most of them came in by train.

Went to a tabletop sale and looked after both of my grandsons in their pushchairs. Got a good BBC radio play for 50p.

At Starbucks I finished the codeword I had nearly finished yesterday and started another. When I say started I mean am very confused by it. I'll see if I can finish it tomorrow.

Friday, 21 February 2014


At Starbucks today I typed in the chunk I had missed out in the first draft (draught?) It was about 100 words. I also edited it so it sounded better. I also completed a codeword in the i newspaper. But no other writing.

I was a bit silly this morning though. While I was speaking to Will the street artist I accidentally dropped some of my tea on his canvas (the wind blowing it was not too helpful either.) I was mortified! I hope he forgave me after he dabbed it off with a cloth.

Today's joke is:

Why did the chicken cross the t?

Because he wanted to dot the i!

Thursday, 20 February 2014

Missed Chunk

Today I managed to proof read two pages. Now I did do one extra one last night but I need to work on some of the writing. I quickly scribbled down what was happening for the NANOWRIMO and I need to make it more conversational. When I proof read the two pages today I found out I had missed out a chunk that I hadn't typed in. I found out where it is in my handwritten manuscript earlier today. I might type it in tomorrow.

Today's joke is:

My dad always used to say, 'Fight fire with fire', that's probably why he got kicked out of the fire brigade!

Wednesday, 19 February 2014


Today I managed to proof read 7 pages, three pages shy of my target. I didn't sleep well the night before though and needed to sleep in the day. I also inputted half of the corrections I had done on paper yesterday.

I might quickly do another three pages now while my son is watching Fast and Loud.

"We at Gas Monkey Garage mention Gas Monkey Garage all the time."

Tuesday, 18 February 2014

Roof Preading

Went to Starbucks in Monk's Cross and proofread 10 pages of TVC as well as typing in 300 words of SAASA chapter 5.

Today's joke is:

Proofreading is a Spoonerism of roof preading (I have no idea what that is though!)

Monday, 17 February 2014

Today (yesterday!)

I managed to proof read 10 pages today (yesterday!) I did 5 just after breakfast and the other five after I had played some of my game.

Tomorrow (today) I will need to try to type in some of SAASA part 3 as well as proofreading.

Today's joke is:

What did the snail say when he sat on a turtle?


Sunday, 16 February 2014

TV series?

Between work and babysitting the grandkids I nearly never wrote anything. Did manage to finish chapter 6 of SAASA when we dropped them back home.

While I waited outside the minster yesterday I saw some people with clipboards walking around. When I asked them what they were doing they said they were planning shots for a children's fantasy story to be filmed near the minster. I quickly scribbled my book title down and gave it to one of them. The man promised he would look at it :)

Friday, 14 February 2014


Freezing cold today so I holed up in Relish in the middle of York and managed to write 500 words of SAASA with a nice hot cup of coffee. Also proof read another 3 pages of TVC and did the corrections from the first 7 pages I'd written on paper.

My wife also found the Baked Bean story I wrote on Sunday :)

Today's joke is:

What do you call a bald porcupine?


Thursday, 13 February 2014

The Long Sleep

I wrote 500 words of SAASA today at Leeds University. Also proof read two pages of TVC. When I got home I was zonked. I don't know whether the cough virus I had has mutated or I had another virus. I feel a bit better now after a long sleep.

A long sleep, sounds a bit like a detective novel from the forties (Or maybe an episode of STTNG?)

Wednesday, 12 February 2014

Oh No!

I have managed to write 500 words of SAASA today, part of it is quite funny. I also managed to proof read the first 4 pages of TVC. It's exciting!

Oh no, I have lost the short story I started on Sunday, The Baked Bean Factory. I have had to reconstruct it based on what I remember. I have typed it in and put it on my Facebook group. It's not as funny as the original one though, I do hope I find where I've put it :(

Today's joke is:

Why did the chicken cross the stage?

To get to the other aside!

Tuesday, 11 February 2014


I have finished typing in Attack on Thera, I only had to do 700 words to complete it. I have also written 200 words of chapter 6 of SAASA, I think I will need to make it funnier though.

Today's joke is:

What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant?

Swimming trunks!

Monday, 10 February 2014

As yet unnamed

While I was supposed to be having my Sunday off, at Starbucks, Monk's Cross, I wrote half of a short story. It is about 250 words at the moment and is about the baked bean factory at the end of the universe.

So far I have typed in 247 words of chapter 11 of AOT. We'll see what happens the rest of the day.

I managed to type in 1,000 words altogether before the evening.

Today's joke is:

What do you call a failed pelican?

A pelican't!

Saturday, 8 February 2014

On Monday

All I managed to do today was type in 400 words of chapter 11 (I did type 130 of those words before I went to bed last night.) So it looks like I'll have it typed in completely on Monday.

Today's joke is:

Who was one of the strongest dictators?


Friday, 7 February 2014

Today's Joke

Managed to type in about 500 words and finished chapter 10 of AOT. Wrote 300 words of SAASA at Relish in town. (Finished chapter 5 and started chapter 6.)

Today's joke is:

How did the hipster burn his mouth?

He ate his dinner before it was cool!

Thursday, 6 February 2014


I managed to type in about 750 words of AOT before I went to my daughter's today. Played Borderlands 2 with my son (now we have our own copy we can play at home!)

Let's hope I can do some more of SAASA tomorrow, at Relish!

Today's joke is:

Why did the chicken run across the road?

To get there quicker!

Wednesday, 5 February 2014

iPad as a lamp

I typed in the last 500 words of chapter 12 of AOT and wrote 700 words of SAASA chapter 5.

While waiting for my wife while she taught I was writing SAASA in the car, using my iPad as a lamp because it was dark, two ladies knocked on my door. They asked me what I was doing because I had been spotted over the last few weeks outside different people's houses. I had to convince them I was a writer waiting for my wife. I wonder what they thought I was doing?

Tuesday, 4 February 2014

Coughing Twice

I typed in 1,000 words of AOT today and wrote 100 words of SAASA (though it's not very funny, I'll have to work on it.) Did most of the 1,000 words on my iPad in the bath. The medicine I got from the doctor yesterday was really good, I only woke up coughing twice.

Today's joke is:

Why didn't the chicken cross the road?

Because he was a chicken!

Monday, 3 February 2014


So today I planned to type in 1,000 words of AOT, proof read one chapter of TVC and write 500 words of SAASA. I have been poorly the last 10 days, I have had a cough and unable to sleep well because of it. My wife booked me in at the new doctor's today (He did know about Dan Leno though!) All I managed to do was type in about 800 words of chapter 12 of AOT. We'll see what happens tomorrow.

Today's joke is:

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, then cross the road again?

Because he was a dirty double crosser!

Saturday, 1 February 2014

Charity shop :(

I went into a charity shop in the middle of York yesterday and found a good game that I wanted, Axis and Allies. It was only £4.99 and so I took it to the counter. I said I would like to put a deposit on it of £1. They said there was no need as they would save it for me for a day. I said I would be in tomorrow.

So today I went back, at about 4.10 pm. They had put it back on the shelf and sold it!!! I wish I had been more forceful now and made them put the £1 deposit on it. So that hurt me.

Because I did so much other work I have only written 20 words of SAASA today. However, while my wife was in Morrisons, I did come up with the first joke for the Sid and Arthur comic strip! :)