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Tuesday 2 December 2014

TEABAG part 2

Looking out of the window the colonel thought about his story so far. He was a clone, another clone, of King Arthur. Produced at the Tulox clone factory on Reema V. “What did that make now?” he whispered and then began to add them up on his fingers. There was good old battle chieftain Arthur, the original. Then there was the Arthur of the Arth series (he was a clone of him.) Art came next, from the Sci Fi  dimension. (Sci Fi sounds a bit like Hi Fi, I suppose it’s supposed to.) Arthur 2 before he disappeared. Evil Arthur from the anti-matter/alternate universe. Then there was himself - another clone of Arth Arthur. And lastly there was him!
He picked up a cup that he hadn’t noticed before to take a drink. As he lifted it up to his lips a pair of eyes appeared on it and blinked at him. “Aargh!” he exclaimed as he threw it away.
It didn’t smash but globbed to the floor and slowly turned into, himself!
“Why do you always do that?” he asked, of the shape changer.
“All the better to see you with,” retorted the cup/colonel/thing.
“What do you want Ruhtra?”
“Nothing, I thought I’d introduce myself to the readers.”
“Think of another reason, we can’t break the 4th wall so soon.”
“Erm,” thought Ruhtra, “special mission?”
“The one where we have to retrieve secret technology.”
“How do you know about that and I do not?”
“Ways and means old chap, ways and means.”
“You know it really is disconcerting conversing with you. You look and sound so much like me.”
“In the mirror?”
“Yeas... in the mirror. It’s really because you’re a copy of the evil Arthur from the anti-matter/alternate universe aren't you?”
“We both know that already?”
“Yes but the read...” he stopped himself, “um, tell me about this special mission then.”
“What, so you can explain it to the others and get to look good in front of them?”
“I am the ranking officer.”
“I outrank you, I was commissioned on the 24th of July 1884.”
“So was I.”
“But I said it first.”
“Doesn't count, anyway you’re lying, just like you always do. You’re supposed to be a liaison between Zathan and Her Majesty’s Britannic forces on Thera.”
“On my own world I’m an emperor.”
“No, you’re part of an emperor.”
“Part of an emperor is more important than a full colonel.”
“Just get on with the explanation or I’ll zap you,” Arthur drew out his stun pistol and turned it to shock then threatened the wayward shape changer with it.
“All right, all right,” he said as he held up his hands, “Let’s begin.”

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